Every day I wake up with the feeling that I want to write something. And every day I don’t even try to sit down at the computer and open a word document to do so. It’s a weird thing, isn’t it, wanting to do something, but not wanting it enough to actually do it?
Don’t get me wrong, I write a bunch at work, but that’s not the same at all. I guess you could call the writing I do at work “creative writing”, but it doesn’t satisfy me on the same level as it did when I used to write stuff for the blog on a more full-time scale.
I have been at my job for about two years now and overall I have worked in project management for four years. So I know I must have built up some skills and confidence in what I do over those years even if I don’t think much about that on a daily basis.
I think that’s what I lack with the blog: confidence in my skills as a creative writer. I was never good at grammar; not in my native language (which is danish) and especially not in english. I feel even more naked when I write in english than when I do so in danish. I never really overcame this fear even tough I have been doing this for more than half of my life.
Somewhere deep down I hold a belief that I have talent, if not in putting together coherent sentencesses, then in conveying a personal and meaningful message to the reader. I think that was what kept me going for the two years that The Measured Life was an active site.
What also kept me going was the wonderful and mostly positive reactions I got from people who had stumpled upon my writings one way or another. I was scared shitless every time I received a comment, mind you! But I also though of it as a very powerful way to connect with like-minded people. I am forever in awe of the people who decided to spend their time with me here on The Measured Life! I can’t thank them enough for being there with me along the way.
I suppose I am now looking to recreate some of that magic that came in to my life back then by getting back into the writing game…
For now I am not gonna spend a lot of time editing or in deep reflection over the output I produce (or at least that is what I tell myself). I am just going to be doing spur of the moment writing and I am going to be frantically clicking publish whenever I don’t feel like working more on a post.
I other news, I hope you guys (if there is still anyone out there) had a lovely Christmas with all of your families and a fantastic new years with whomever you happened to celebrate that with! I had a very eventful holiday break myself (too eventful even) but that is for another post.