First Impressions

First Impressions

Today I lost a very great job opportunity because of certain communicative misconceptions between the interviewer and I. I of course tried to remedy the situation, but the truth is that people very rarely change their already established first impression of other people. At least not in the short term.

This could be because of something called confirmation bias. That is, all of us hold certain beliefs to be true, and we are programmed to feel negative about things that are counter to those beliefs. No matter if said beliefs are based on solid evidence or not.

I therefore think that, while it goes against my own beliefs, it is necessary not to be completely honest whenever you meet someone for the first time. I am not saying to be dishonest, but that withholding certain aspects of the truth is often in ones best interest.

Personally, for example, I find some people to be quite biased against mindful living, meditation, and spirituality in general. I used to be one of those people, and I viewed spiritual folks as being more or less crazy loons. They would never have a chance to redeem themselves.

Of course, later on I understood that I was the one viewing the world solely through my own eyes, and that doing so was not bringing me lasting happiness. All it did was make me a negative grump who criticized everything and everyone.

Unfortunately, most people never get to realize that every single aspect of reality is up to subjective judgement, and that their judgment is just about as subjective as any other. Evidence is secondary when it comes to human feelings.

What we can learn from this is to respect everyone equally, no matter how skewed a view of things we might think they have.

But more importantly so, what I really take from this great loss of opportunity is an understanding that situational awareness is a very important skill to cultivate in life:

Sometimes, holding back to begin with is the best way to get people on your side in the long run.

If this makes you think, please add to the discussion below! I need the input severely.

Was this post meaningful to you? If so, I always appreciate comments, likes and shares. ThanksEnhanced by Zemanta!

Jakob Scheel

Jakob Scheel

Jakob is a Copenhagen-based Anthropologist who does Project Management by day and Photography by night.
Jakob Scheel

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